Ming, I agree with Kim. Also, concerned about this bulge thing. Guess you'll have to fill us in on D day. Back on track, I think. All the company is gone and it's my Friday. Very scarey storms here on the east coast. Weigh in at Mom's tommorrow. Have a great day all!

COMMENT TO KIM
That was the sweetest. Thank you.
Love,
M

THOUGHT PROVOKING POST BY MIGNON

Dearest Mignon,
I should have told you this when I saw you in May.  I thought you looked fabulous, the best I've seen you look in years, and to me, didn't think you had any reason to join our group to lose weight.  And I can tell you have focused on "self care".  Can't imagine having trouble trying on clothes.  You have to educate me on the bulge in the crotch area, as it's over my head.
Mom's body vs. Dad's.  Well I can say I haven't been as blessed as most of my sibs as I am the runt of the family or maybe Tootsie has this spot. 
Mom's blessings ... I do have her great legs.
Mom's attributes that are not blessings .... big boobs
Other than that, I am all Dad.
Mignon, you have beauty, brains, and maybe (?) balls.  Revel in this.
Love, Kim

TRIGGERED
Today, for the first time since June 1, the day I abandoned all things sweet, I got triggered. For weeks, I've put off doing something about replacing my super-faded summer yoga pants, so wornout they have an embarrassing hole in the back. I put it off until this morning when I went to downtown Santa Monica's TJ Maxx and took a half-dozen "activewear" pants into the dressing room to try on. Can you guess where this story is heading? Yep. An experience almost as bad as trying on bathing suits. I was prepared for the belly bulge, but my thighs? They looked huge. (Do I have Dad's, not Mom's, body?) Worse was the bulge -- how can I say this? -- in the front crotch area. (Perhaps you are fortunate enough not to know what I mean.)


Now, I am triggered, primed for emotional eating.


In the checkout line, I had to pass by the cookies and candy and the vending machine with a shelf full of Diet Coke at a discount. (In spite of everything, I had forced myself to choose a pair of yoga pants. It was either that or continue wearing the ones with the growing hole.)


I managed to get out of there alive, without a Diet Coke, without anything sweet. But I had one more errand: Von's grocery store. First thing upon entering, I see slices of moist-looking lemon cake under glass at the in-store Starbucks counter. (I could be in a packed football stadium and my eye, without even trying, would find the one single cookie somewhere in the bleachers.)


I turned away from the lemon cake and lots of other slippery things as I shopped, and managed to get out of Von's alive too.


Sounds like I'm exaggerating, no doubt. But if any of you know the pull, the force field of emotional eating, you know what I'm talking about.


Driving home felt like heading for shelter. I calmed myself down by reminding myself that I had wild rice and cranberries at home, as well as some watermelon. And also that I could write about this challenging trigger on our blog.


Thank you for listening.

And, as I think of losing ounce by ounce, I am reminded of the movie, Sea Biscuit, in which the jockey (Red Pollard) says to SeaBiscuit while they are rehabilitating each other "As Hadrian said "Brick by Brick" my boy.  "Brick by Brick".  Like frost yourself with diamonds--ice yourself with water during this upcoming heat wave.  Mignon, you can join us in solidarity!!!  Drink up!

MY OTHER NON-SCALE "WEIGHS"
In addition to monitoring the state of my hip bones,the size of my waist and belly rolls,and the fit of my pants, I failed to mention my two other tried-and-true ways of scanning for hoped-for weight loss. The first: full-body naked front-and-back mirror assessment, the least pleasant means, not simply because of what I'm seeing reflected back to me, but because of knowing that being thinner cannot reverse the effects of time. Know what I mean? The second means of measuring that I haven't mentioned yet is unique to me on our team. Having had a mastectomy with reconstruction, my "new" breast is unable to gain weight. Strange but true. My "real" breast, on the other hand, can and does gain weight. Therefore, when I'm cooperating with the "me" that wants to return to a leaner state,and that's eating more wisely to accomplish that desire,I watch vigilantly for when my larger left side begins again to match the smaller right.


You wanted to know all that, right?


Note to Col: I am grateful for the body I have, the strong legs that take me places, all five senses that work, the heart that still beats. True, though, that wanting to be thinner is part good self-care and part wanting to look good.

Hi guys, I am out here. 145 on my scale this morning. But, admittedly it's been a challenge with the summer activity of vacation, company etc. But, not giving up by any means. I haven't even been able to pick up a book for 10 minutes. In the meantime Kyle told me he has lost 10 lbs. I know he's not really trying I think it's the good effect of summer activity for him. So motivated by you sister's.

COMMENT TO COL
Hey, that's excellent. Apropos your doubt about Wigley's scale, I remember you asking me before our ride down to Baltimore whether or not I thought you looked like you had lost weight. So perhaps you have, indeed, gained the 6 pounds back. No matter which is correct, though, it's nutrient-rich, calorie-rich cuisine for you, right?

I weighed in yesterday and was back to 112 lbs.  Maybe there was something wrong with the scale in Wigley's office.  Lost 6 in 4 weeks then added 6 in 4 weeks???  Makes you wonder.

I think my lesser intake of food is affecting my brain function.  Today is Day 47 not today is today 47.  Keeping quantity down.  Need more water which I think I'll get when this heat wave arrives tomorrow.  Reading good books--"Girl Gone" and "The Witness"  Quick reads but enjoyable.

DAY 47

Just counted back from last info and apparently today is today 47already.  7 weeks to go.  Yikes! Motivate.

I'M HERE

DAY?  I charted my weight loss for the week on my WW site and was warned I'm losing too much too fast.  Could be losing muscle mass (DO NOT WANT THIS), end up anemic, etc.  So I have to temper my excitement at the weight loss and more than 2lbs a week is not good. 

Quite honestly I think the weight loss to date is water.

Looking forward to the weekend.  I hope to escape on Sat to the beach early and plan to stake my claim and go for an incredible walk and read a great book.  

WHERE IS EVERYBODY?!
I want to hear more from my blogmates. No detail is too small. And, Ms. Col, I don't believe we've heard about how the weight-gaining is going, have we? 


For me, Operation Weight-Loss has been going something like this:  On the one hand, feeling virtuous about how much water I'm drinking, effortlessly actually; I had no idea how much water my body wants, nor how much I like drinking it. (I do meticulously mark my water chart throughout the day, though). Then, on the other hand, I go to yoga this morning, we do a shoulder stand, an upside-down inversion pose, which means my eyes end up staring directly at the multiple belly rolls that have tumbled down toward my neck, threatening to cut off my air passageway.


What the right hand giveth, the left hand taketh away.
But semper fi, right?

SHOWER FILTER ORDERED  

COMMENT TO KIM
Closing in on 10 -- repeat, 10 -- pounds?! Oh, my, is all I can say. Oh, my. Yes, we can. Yes, you can. 

Freaking great, Kim.  You are becoming inspirational for me.  "Look at the long view".  As we work towards getting into the next decade of pounds, that is my mantra.  Next round of tens, baby.

GOALPOST

Weighed in last night.  Down 1.2 for a total of 9.2.  I'm more than 1/2 way to my goal for 8/16.  Now, I just have to get more active.  Went for a terrific hour long walk on Sunday. 

COMMENT TO CAMILLE
I'm on the ounce-at-a-time program too. But..semper fi, right?

The scale continues to INCH, and I do mean inch, down ounce by painful ounce.  WATER!

ZEROWATER ORDERED!
...from Amazon, free shipping and no tax! So very glad to be making this positive change.

COMMENT TO LESLIE
How I wish I were trekking up that bridge with you this morning, the water on either side of us! A walk that includes an ascent is my favorite kind. Enjoy!

Just want to say I'm still here. Going to tackle that bridge today no matter what or who trys to get in my way. After the ortho appointments of course. And, I'm going to go water myself right now.

A DIFFERENT KIND OF SPRITE
Moving right along, I've now got my first-choice shower filter:  the handheld Sprite, original version. 99% sure on this. Consumer Reports hasn't started to review shower filters yet -- sure they will because now that people are solving their drinking water concerns, they are turning to the quality of the water they wash their skin and hair with, chlorine being the standout problem. I imagine you all rolling your eyes at all this stuff. I can take it. It's just that once I started drinking glasses of water in earnest, it heightened my awareness of everything water. No doubt you'll be relieved that the last words you will hear from me on this subject will be to tell you I've turned my 99%s into orders. Over and out.

ZEROING IN ON ZEROWATER
For my drinking water solution, I'm 99% sure I'm going with ZeroWater which, BTW, has a 23-cup carafe!
(See my email).  Shower filter next.

MY MAGNUM OPUS ON WATER
Check your email. If it's too much to take in, no worries. I've put off looking into this for years because of the overwhelm factor. Now that I'm going through the expensive, environmentally-harmful bottled water almost faster than I can stock it, I need to do something, make some changes, soon.

COMMENT TO COL
Too right!

"So before we convince ourselves that our bodies are too this or too that, shouldn't we get more in touch with how wonderful it is to have a body in the first place, not matter what it looks or feel like?" -Jon Kabat Zinn.  Message:  Treasure it, care for it, WATER it!

HIP BONES

Remember those two points of hip bone you could feel and how your stomach would go concave between them when you were lying down? (I can't remember my stomach ever going concave when I was standing up.) I used to wonder, "Where did my stomach go?" I find myself testing those two points now before I get out of bed in the morning, hoping they'll feel sharper. I wonder, "Will my stomach ever lie like a hammock between them again." So when I wrote earlier about my alternatives to using the scale -- monitoring the rolls and whether my pants are getting looser -- I forgot to mention this other technique -- more an instinct than a technique. (BTW, I happened to notice this moderately attractive, slim looking guy getting out of his car the other day. His T-shirt was hiked up enough to reveal a moderately-sized belly roll. He looked like he felt so good about himself and unself-conscious about showing some flesh that I deduced he'd just lost a ton of weight and didn't mind at all that a bulgy remnant was showing. I thought, "Ha, men have the same issues.")

A HEADS UP: WATER PART 2 
Stay tuned. Because of my renewed resolve to drink more water, lots more water, I've started my own investigation into something that I have put off forever, something that affects me daily: drinking tap water vs bottled water vs filtered water. (Brita, for instance, is an example of a carafe system that filters water.) And there's a related residential water issue that only recently came to my attention: We are exposed to more chlorine and fluoride from our showers than the tap. You know how we pay a fortune to have our hair lightened? Chlorine eats up a lot of that money. Chlorine affects brunette hair with color more than blond hair with color, but nonetheless. And if you're like me, you may be throwing even more money away on color-protection shampoos, or restorative hair treatments to minimize damage. Besides hair, chlorine from the shower also is incredibly harsh on the skin. Body creams can only do so much to minimize that. Preview of my conclusions for both showering and drinking water:  filters, filters, filters. Stay tuned.

hi i'm back in the picture mom

Me, too, back to my normal life.  Except for one day, have been in Delaware since last Sunday.  Having Chris, Chef Extraordanaire, in residence is dangerous.  So is feeding Adelaide with one bite for her, one bite for me.  Having said that, I surprisingly, and happily, gained 1/10 of a pound.  I WILL take that.  Back in the saddle today.  Giddyup!  We need to keep riding to the finish line, and I don't mean August 16 (for me anyway)!

Day 53 Back in the real world

Hi girls, I'm back and just read your posts. You've been busy and successful. I didn't have the water I was having before I went away but I'm back and going to try to find your chart ming. Kim I love your BITE IT WRITE IT, Kyle informed me this morning "How long has it been since we started this diet?" Didn't really know he was on the program. He told me he has lost 4 lbs. I told him it was the 3300 foot mountain he climbed the other day. Vacation is not good for dieting but I tried to be mindful. This is key.   Getting ready to try a new salsa recipe of corn and tomatoe - one cup increments. Stay with it, get a walk in today.  How many calories does bathroom cleaning burn? Just curious. Have a great day!

Comment to Kimmie.  Any "hike" is not without obstacles.  You're down 8.  Now ego says...It's not the right water bottle, go ahead have that one DC, it's been a tough week.  NO.NO.NO.  Remind yourself as to why you've taken this challenge. And say, YES.YES.YES.  Pour yourself a glass of water, maybe add a twist of lemon, go out and sit in your beautiful garden...sip, breathe, sip, breathe.  Today's a new day.

Hang in there Kim.  Remember this is a hurdle you will climb over.

COMMENT TO KIM
Have to rush to your support after your latest entry after your long day today. Should you cave, go back to Diet Coke? Absolutely, unequivocably not. Stay the course--even through bumps of discouragement. About your new water bottle, use it without worry. You can replace it when you're ready. No rush. You're not going to get cancer. All the water you drank has been healthy and good for you. If I can ever find my SIGG,in spite of a question about its lining, I plan on using it until I decide otherwise. I think it's better that we're informed than not. But no worries, Kim. Keep your resolve. You're doing great. And I know how much letting your lean body emerge means to you. It's there and waiting.

SPELLING ERRORS

WHERE IS THE BLESSED SPELL CHECK IN THIS BLOG?  I ABHOR SPELLING & GRAMMATICAL ERRORS. 

IT DON'T COME EASY

Trying to do the right thing.... drink more water and now the water bottle that is helping me dring more is a bust.  What to do?  Information overload vs. I am drinking on average 64 oz + per day of water. Should I cave?  Drink Diet Coke?  Eat foods aren't good for me? 

I have had a rough week and ready to explode and cave.

Ugh!

I'm at a low right now!

COMMENT TO KIM:
Love the look of your new Thermos SIPP. But...

Basically, the SIPP is a plastic, so even though it's "BPA-free," whatever that is, apparently there can still be some problems with it. (There's an article from the NRDC, an A++ organization, below.) While I was looking into the SIPP, I noticed that my SIGG, non-plastic, may have a problem with its liner.


Bottom-line: I suggest using your new handsome SIPP until either the plastic starts to smell, or you've worn it out and then switch to something considered better. (My protein shaker is made out of stainless and it's been brilliant; no accumulated plastic smells; no wear and tear so far.)


IT DON'T COME EASY, DOES IT?!?!


Here's the NRDC opinion:

February 2009 PLASTIC WATER BOTTLES  Is "BPA-free" the Same as Safe?

Not that long ago, reusable bottles made of clear, hard, polycarbonate plastic were the hippest water carriers to have, beloved by hikers and college students alike. Then came a draft report from the National Toxicology Programin April 2008 about possible health risks from a chemical in the polycarbonate known as bisphenol A (BPA). Though it soft-pedaled the reasons for concern (there is actually an alarming amount of scientific evidence that BPA may be highly toxic), the news was widely carried in the media and the bottles' appeal evaporated overnight. In response,Nalgene, the manufacturer whose name had become synonymous with this type of bottle, announced it would phase out the product and replace it with a new model that was equally clear, hard, beautiful -- and BPA-free. So -- problem solved. Or was it? The new Nalgene water bottle is made of a "copolyester" plastic manufactured by the Eastman company with the trade name Tritan. So are new bottles by Kor and Camelbak. All trumpet the fact that their bottles are BPA-free, with the implication that BPA-free is the equivalent of safe. But we have no way of knowing because the ingredients that make up Tritan have been kept secret. They could include another dangerous chemical...or not. Since the ingredients have not been identified, no one can say. All we know about the Tritan bottles is that, like polycarbonate, they fall into the #7 category of "other" plastics in the identification system used to mark plastic containers. (The numbers appear inside a triangle of chasing arrows.) When it comes to 1 through 6, the numbers are relatively informative, but 7 is the mystery number. Here's the lowdown on #7: #7 plastic is usually polycarbonate and contains BPA. If you are in love with a particular #7 bottle, you could call the manufacturer to identify the plastic, but that might not make matters clearer. Learning, for instance, that the plastic is Tritan would not tell you enough. The "better safe than sorry" approach would be to avoid #7 altogether in my opinion. Despite the "generally regarded safe" remarks above, a recent analysis by the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel of 10 products advertised as microwave-safe found that BPA leached into food from packaging labeled #1, 2 and 5. This analysis was part of ongoing coverage by the paper of chemicals in consumer products in a series called "Chemical Fallout," which won the 2008 John B. Oakes Award for Distinguished Environmental Journalism. If this leads you to feel queasy about plastic in general (I still use it, though never in the microwave), consider food-grade stainless steel for your water bottles. Klean Kanteen and New Wave Enviro are two companies that offer such products. Both provide a choice of caps made of stainless steel or plastic. Some people object to the fact that these stainless steel bottles are manufactured in China because of the lethal contamination recently found in several products made there. If that concerns you, I suggest you call the bottle-makers (both American) and ask what steps they take to ensure their bottles are safe. As to the popular aluminum bottles made by Sigg, they have a lining whose ingredients, like Tritan's, have not been disclosed. Sigg does state categorically that tests show the lining does not leach BPA, and there is no reason to assume otherwise. But this is another case where a manufacturer could assuage doubts by being more forthcoming. I wish I could tell you about the newer corn-based plastic bottles, but I haven't been able to find enough information about them. If none of these choices strike you as perfect -- well, it's not a perfect world. However, better health and safety regulations would help, starting with labeling requirements that tell the public what food and beverage containers are made of.

Check your water jug. Those giant jugs of bottled water delivered to homes and offices are often made of polycarbonate. You can look for the telltale #7 on the plastic, but remember it's not conclusive. Call the company to find out for sure what the plastic is made of.

COMMENT TO KIM
As you would say, "Question": Can you tell me what the Target water bottle by Thermos is made of? I know that some water bottles are better than others, health and taste-wise and cleaning-wise. I have a SIGG, which is the best, but haven't been able to find it.

WATER

I believe it.  For those struggling, go to Target and buy a water bottle made by Thermos and it may say SIP on it.  It' tall, slim for a woman's hands and it holds 22oz.  I'm already on my third refill today, so I am way over the requirements needed.  And I don't get into my car without it.  TRUST ME ON THIS ONE, IT'S EASY.

wa.ter  

• The human body is 65% water, making us more liquid than solid by a margin of almost 2 to 1. (If you weigh 130 pounds, for example, 84.5 pounds of you is water!)
• Earth is 70% water.
• "If I could teach my patients and student three things that would keep them forever young, they would be 1. drink water, 2. drink water, and 3. drink more water...If you don't drink water, you can't metabolize fat, nor can your body flush wastes from its cells. A dehydrated body provokes the development of aging, inflammatory compounds. Mild dehydration will cause a 3% drop in baseline metabolism, resulting in the gain of one pound of fat every six months...Water is a great weapon to put out the inflammation fire that consumes our youth. I drink at least 8 to 10 glasses of water a day and urge my patients to do the same. Avoid tap water--it may contain compounds like heavy metals that you don't need (and may be bad for you)...avoid chlorinated water whenever possible."

               --Nicholas Perricone, MD 
                 The Wrinkle Cure
                 The Perricone Prescription:
                 A Physician's 28-Day Program
                 for Total Body & Face Rejuvenation                                                       
                 

CHECK YOUR EMAILS
As an incentive to drink 4 8-ounce glasses of water a day until 8/16 (don't know what happens after that), I cobbled together a chart, which I've emailed to the entire team in case it might be helpful to you too. My first 8-ounce glass sits beside me as I write. Just took a sip. Ahhhhhhh...

AS OF TODAY
June 1 was my personal start date for our countdown to August 16 -- 2 days after I got home from NJ. In the past 20 days I've been inching my way toward 4 8-oz glasses of water a day, minimum. Inching. As of today, I have used up every Zero Vitamin Water I had on hand and finished my last 1-gallon jug of Arizona Diet Green Tea with Ginseng (turned onto several years ago by Bill Nickles). I had already stopped buying Diet Coke. So from now until August 16, the intention is water only, plus a cup of hot green tea in the morning. Why does this feel more daunting than eating less?

psyche....you should be so proud of yourself.

Kim--This is so great.  You must be stoked.  8 pounds--amazing.  Have a mindful eating day!

COMMENT TO KIM
8 POUNDS?! omg, wtg, hi5, gr8, xlnt!! May your scale be your BFF. Semper fi!

SHARING SUCCESS & A GREAT SAYING

Hi Girls,  Lost 3.2lbs for a total of 8lbs for 3 weeks.  Yipee Yipee Yipee

Quote from WW this week.  I think its great

"One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well"

Virginia Woolf

MIGNON IS FUNNY

Mignon - you are funny and enjoy your writing

COMMENT TO KIM
1-Cup or Die, Semper Fi!


PS: Re popcorn & me. It's not that I'm into deprivation (altho with the Catholic background deprivation would fit right in); it's that I have to be cautious with foods that are "slippery" for me personally. Simple carbohydrates that set up the phenomenon of craving. Craving which causes the slide into overeating, ie, I eat a cookie, then the cookie eats a cookie, and then the cookie eats me.

MUFFIN TOPS

One night at dinner when he was here for Spring break, Robert described some of his classmates, including a girl whose "muffin top" could be seen "bulging over her bra" through the sheer blouses she wore. (How does a 15-year old boy, mostly into classic literature and such, even know what a "muffin top" is at this stage, and is he really saying aloud the word "bra" to me?!) Needless to say, he was appalled at this girl. As my own muffin tops -- plural -- were silently aghast that he had spotted them too, I tried persuading him to look upon his classmate with compassion. He wasn't having any of it. To him, she was a walking exemplification of a lack of self-control.

CUT TO PRESENT DAY: I don't use a scale, but I do take note, by mirror and feel, of the various frontal and side rolls, the thicker waist and falling belly, that began their emergence about 10 years ago. I'll never forget driving home from work at Dutton's one night and -- you know how you just instinctively know that something's different about your body? maybe a simple bump or cut you didn't know you had? -- well, for some reason like that, I reached down to my waist and noticed a smallish but distinct roll spilling over the top of my pants, and low-riding pants at that. (I can't use the word "muffin top"; somehow it's more horrid that the word "roll" for me.) "What's that? Oh, I guess I've gained some weight." Not great news, but something I could cope with and do something about. But no, this wasn't about a few more pounds, or not completely. This was about expansion. (I can't say "middle-age spread" either.) My waist was thickening as I drove. It was probably around the same time that I started noticing that my bikini underwear was feeling funny. To get them to fit properly, I had to kind of tuck my belly into the bikini bottoms. When this went on for a considerable duration, I began thinking, "Oh, no, this is not good."

I was thinking about this this morning and thus my recollection of the conversation with Robert. So while you sisters are checking the scale, I'm feeling the you-know-whats, and hoping my pants will start falling off.

MODERATION PEARLS

Staying on track.  Get those ziploc 1 cup plastic containers an keep it with you.  Help yourself to whatever is in front but stay with the 1 cup. 

If you are into tracking your food, IF YOU BITE IT YOU RIGHT IT DOWN

I JUST got back from a couple of days at Ashley and Chris'.  Yes, that's right, Chris the amazing chef.  Well, I must say it was as if "I opened the barn door.".  I'll weigh myself tomorrow morning.  Not looking forward to it.  I'll get back on track today.  Oh, yuck.  Shame on me.  Babysat Adelaide last night so "the kids" could go out to dinner and celebrate their first anniversary.  Adelaide is total love.  I'm so honored that she'll reach for me.  Pure joy.  Good luck tonight, Kim.  I had to say I was thinking about you a couple of days ago and meant to call and tell you--I am so amazed by you and everything you have, and are, accomplishing--whether its career, your beautiful gardens, but especially your children.  You have so much to be personally proud of.  My hat is so off to you. 

DEPRIVATION OR MODERATION

Deprivation, is it sustainable?  What's wrong with popcorn and the other things we like?  Nothing.  The less than desirable food choices aren't what puts on weight, it' the lack of moderation.  Enjoy your food, don't deprive yourself, just find a way to balance and moderate.  Tracking and measuring the foods you eat helps.

Today is weigh in day and looking forward to it.  I absolutely hate that it's at 7PM at night as by the end of the day I'm 2 lbs more than when I started.

POPCORN CORRECTION
Jolly Time's box contains 4, not 3, bags of popcorn as I stated earlier. Rats! Sentenced to one more night of popcorn. (Kim, 3 cups only, over and out.)

ON THE VIRTUE OF OMISSION
An axiom of good writing, or any art for that matter, holds that what you leave out can be more important than what you leave in. Applying that axiom to stopping at Trader Joe's today, I left out:  my favorite cinnamon cake (again), peanut-butter filled pretzels (again), bread of any kind, chips of any kind, not even sweet potato chips, cookies of any kind, chocolate of any kind or size.


FYI:  I've discovered that I am the owner of not one but three 1-cup measuring cups. I've put them into rotation.


Popcorn Update:  Tonight is my last night of popcorn for the foreseeable future, any kind of popcorn, 94% fat-free or otherwise. A box of Jolly Time, WW-approved, comes with 3 microwaveable bags. I bought a box on Saturday. Ate the first bag Saturday night. Ate the 2nd bag the following night on Sunday (last night). And I'm already planning on eating the 3rd and final bag tonight (Monday). Carbohydrate moderation and I have a failure to communicate, irreconcilable differences, if you will.

A just-baked buttery cake came to my AA meeting this morning. I could feel the warmth through the plate as I, dying, passed it to the person next to me. Eventually, though, it made its way back to my end of the table where it then sat, and sat, and sat. I didn't have any, but it was close. 

GOAL SETTING

I'm starting off today with a "to do" list (form of goal) and I'm thinking about goal setting.  I wanted to share my thoughts.  A goal is a dream with a deadline

Goals have to be SMART --- specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, & time driven

Goals are all about planning --- if you don't plan, you will not succeed

I'm giving myself a pat on the back today -- I have made SMART weight loss goals for myself and I'm succeeding.  I have the right attitude -- I'm excited and have a spring in my step.

I currently am a size 16 and so look forward to fitting into a 14.  I have many clothes never worn with tags still on and clothes barely worn at all.  By day's end, I will have hung my smaller size 14's in my closet so I can visually see what I'm working towards.

Now I'm off to shower, more laundry, errands, and yard work.

Have a wonderful day!

WE ARE NOT ALONE

    In the popcorn aisle in Von's this morning, I met woman already studying the shelves. "So many choices," I said to her. "My sister tells me to get the 94% fat-free kind."

    "Oh, that's right here!" she said.

    Was I ever grateful--all those "butter" and "fake butter" and "palm oil" popcorns gross me out, plus for sure they aren't the ones Kim recommends.

    "Weight Watchers approves of this," she added, pointing out the WW seal of approval on the box.

    "My sister just joined WW!"

    "Me too!"she said. Kim, I think she was ready to look you up in a Santa Monica meeting but I told her you were in Boston.

    I wondered aloud about the "egg and milk" ingredients listed on the Jolly Time popcorn box. With her smart phone she scanned the bar code on the box and her WW app immediately displayed the WW points etc  on the phone's small screen. (Although I still didn't find out about the egg and milk.) AMAZING! We each took a box off the shelf and then she said, "Oh give me another one, would you?"

    Cut to: Back home, I hold the elevator for a delivery man who's clearly delivering food to someone on the first floor. "Takeout, huh?"  "Not exactly, a snack for mid-day." "Oh, it's an eating program?" "Yeah, they get 3 meals a day delivered."

    It takes what it takes.

    What are the latest statistics? 60% obesity in the USA and counting?
    Last thought: Why am a shopping for popcorn? Looking for another fix?

    

    

    

Colleen
Thanks for posting this article, which I read in its entirety. It expresses pretty much how I've been approaching what I eat and how much I eat. I for sure want to shed the excess fat pounds. As I wrote in an earlier post, ever since my most recent breast surgery, my body/mind simply won't tolerate being pushed. So I'm still feeling my way toward returning to cardio exercise healthfully. My body/mind is pleased by the nutrient-dense whole foods I'm emphasizing, but it's not over its love affair with comfort foods and oversized portions.
Bruce Lee is quoted in one of the Comments following the article:  Water flows, "Be like water."

A poignant philosophy in yoga is making an effort, of doing the work and doing it with ease.  I can't remember the Sanskrit words at the moment.  Mignon and I have talked about this notion many times.  When I came across this article this am, I thought, if you were inclined, you might read and find an interesting perspective of diet and exercise.

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-5128/Why-Exercise-and-Burning-Calories-Wont-Help-You-Lose-Weight.html

Day 60 but whose counting, Me. I just noticed the different times of our postings. Opposite schedules. Opposite time zones. So, first to say Mignon, as I've told Kim forever and will tell you about the hunger thing, I get so hungry if I eat breakfast that I call it "Open for business all day long"
Then one day I ate so many carrots because of this zero thing I think they made me sick. I am trying to change it. Colleen and I got into this discussion about your cup thing. Really, I couldn't understand. It almost became a little argumetative,  So, I said, if you make a pot of rice lets say or that good cranberry thing.  And, you dole it out in cup size portions using plastic bags or those little containers. And, you have leftovers, 1/8 of a cup. I say you just add it into the next meal and don't really count it. Like a round up in numbers it's minimal. I'm guessing you did that. Colleen when you read this you still have to say what you were saying cause I just couldn't grasp the concept. Saving money is alway good! Next note, went to Macy's with Col for the 1 day sale (which I swear if all the time) . Bought 12 pairs of underwear which Col loves tried and true. Camille gently pointed out (bikini's) wouldn't my stomach hangover. She was right. I would never think of this. Anyway, clearly I should have been hunting for spanx. I am returning 6 pairs. I'm staying optimistic as they are really great. Working in a restaurant with great food can be challenging. I did have a pork chop. The big new is I am not eating right now which is another part of my day I get down to business. Colleen, Are you drinking those things you should be drinking? I would like to see a post here. And, if you want to go back to Macy's for anything in the am call me. Lastly, I can't believe it's only 60 days till we can hang out on Col's deck again. Me, vacation in 2 days, I will be absent from the blog but I will be here in spirit. Have a great day all!

Kim, I still can't post a "Comment" so I'm using the main page. Thanks for the popcorn advice and the LIMITS. 3 cups max. I got it. I need that guideline. Otherwise, it's the entire bowl.


About whole foods helping me to feel full. Nothing, except maybe a giant portion of a green vegetable makes me feel full. I don't have a normal stomach that tells me when it's had enough. My stomach never seems to have enough. I don't know how much of that is biochemistry and how much is emotional craving and anxiety management. It's been this way as long as I can remember. 


It occurs to me that maybe I was "legimately" hungry this afternoon. I just couldn't get a sense of what my body needed. So carrots were a kind of stand-in.

I don't know if I'm losing weight (altho my ancient cargo pants feel somewhat looser), but I may be saving money. Food that I would normally eat in a single day now spread over 2 or 3 days--savings for sure. No Zero Vitamin Water for now--that's $1-$2 a day saved. No sweets--that's $3-4 a day saved. No gas for craven trips to the store for sweets--that's 50-cents maybe. And more... Money better spent on exotic olive oils and vinegars and organic produce, if whole foods are going to hold my interest for the long run.
 
Today I'm resurrecting my air popcorn maker, which has been idle for 15 years plus, although I suppose even air-popcorn can be overeaten too. What's Weight Watchers' position on popcorn?


It's going on 2 o'clock in the afternoon. Honestly, I keep wanting to eat something. Oh, right, I have some baby carrots in the refrigerator.

Weekend, nice weather, feeling free--look out, girls.  Hunker down and keep at PORTION CONTROL.  Today is June 16. Only two months.  We NEED to do it.  Circle the wagons. "To our health".

1-CUP EATING (Cont'd)

So here's a dilemma--or math problem, if you will. If a cranberry-rice recipe makes 3 cups plus overflow, what happens to the overflow? If a fresh pineapple cut up renders 2 cups and then some, what do you do? Do you apply a strict or loose interpretation of the law? Just now for lunch, I couldn't believe my good fortune when, after scooping out a single-cup's worth of cranberry-rice and then pineapple from their containers, less than a cup of each remained. What to do. Should I leave the surplus and have less than a cup of it to eat tomorrow? (A bleak prospect.) Or would it be okay to exceed the proscribed limit this once? (The equally bleak prospect of risking the slippery slope.) Should I? Shouldn't I? Is god watching? Knowing me, what do you think I did? Did I make the strict or looser choice? 

62 The only thing I can do well today is count the days. Yesterday was the last day of school and last night we went to the ice cream palor. Kyle's favorite one. I didn't order anything. No thanks Bobby, I don't want a bite of your cone. But, Kyle, just one bite, two, three. You get the picture. At least he didn't say "Why didn't you just order your own" Maybe it wasn't that bad.  Stay away from celebrations.  The only thing good I can say is I did not touch the stromboli that was made later.  Back on it today. I'm getting a really small cake for father's day. Knowing in advance I'm not going to have a piece will help. 4 more days until vacation. I usually do pretty good on vacation because I tend to be more active.  Just made my water chart for the day. I'm still a guzzler Kim. I wish a pretty jug could make me a sipper. I will try something on my long drive to Richmond. Thanks.

WATER TIP COMMENT
Kim, The image of you driving along the highways and byways with a water tube in your mouth is TOO hilarious. (Coming soon: "How to Drink and Drive Safely" by Kim McCarthy.) The serious intensity with which you've embraced hydration...well, I'm not sure I've ever seen anything quite like it. You go, grrrllll. I'm the pokey horse behind, lapping at the occasional puddle.   

WATER TIP

I found this to be extremely helpful.  I went to target and purchased several types of "high end" water bottles.  Favorite is without a straw (skip the camelback) and have two favorites that are slim for a woman's hand grip and fills 16 to 22 oz.  Fill them up, put in the fridge and ready to go when you go.
DO NOT GET IN THE CAR WITHOUT ONE WITH YOU.  It's so easy to drink as you drive.

Today I did awful on my water intake as I had a day from hell at work at barely had a moment to breathe.  Got in 22 oz with my great water bottle.

TRUST ME AND TRY IT

It's crazy how the healthiest of foods are so expensive.  Mignon, I laughed out loud as you were able to find the joy in a measuring cup, as Kim so authoritatively recommended.  I love us!

OBSERVATIONS
1. Our blog is helping all of us stay steady.
2. Eating healthy, whether vegan or not, means more fresh fruits and vegetables which means more work. That's not a complaint, though. So far, cutting up salad vegetables in advance is really working for me. (The price of a single cucumber shocked me yesterday) I look forward to salads again. And have re-found arugula.
3. In school we all learned about homo sapiens discovering the first tool--a breakthrough of massive proportions. That's how I feel now about the lowly measuring cup--the 1-cup measuring cup. It's brought some longed-for sanity to my eating. One cup of my cranberry-rice, say, in a bowl. Not as much rice as I can pile into a bowl or, worse, eating it straight out of a Tupperware container, the only limit being however much is there. With a 1-cup serving, the temptation to go back for a second exists but, so far, the pause after finishing a single-cup serving helps to assuage the pull toward another.
4. I guess 1 cup of peanuts at a time is out, right? (Yesterday, I also bought a jar of dry-roasted peanuts--not going to be doing that again for a while).
5. Last night the most beautiful, ample apple pie you've ever seen was sitting on the serving counter at my AA sponsor's house. I didn't have a piece but had to leave the room.
Love, M

I am trying to stay positive.  After two weeks, 4 pounds.  I am SO mindful of what I am putting in my mouth.  I have to be better at getting more water.  As much as I do drink, I still don't get enough.  I hope everyone has gotten things going more smoothly in the elimination process.  Have a great day.

Day 63.  Congratulations to all. I'm reading our successes. Mignon, sugar in control. Kim the diet cokes are huge for you I know. That's awesome. Camille, I love the mindful eating. It it so true if you just stay aware. This blog is of great support. I am aware that the junk in my house is minimal. No one else has said anything but I'm aware. I too have cut waaaayyyy down on any dairy which means cheese. I feel pretty good. School's out whoo hoo so now I can work on the sleep issue as well. Keep up the good work girls. Have a great day!

Kim--Hip, hip, hooray, sister!  Well done.  I know those pounds are hard won.  Keep it up.  One meal at a time.  Amazingly good job on the Diet Coke.  If you really miss the caffeine, you could try some delicious coffee.  I think you will be amazed once you are off the DC how awful it tastes when you have it again in the future.  Take that from a former Coke in the morning and throughout the day person.  Have a great day.  Great Job.

KEEPING MYSELF IN CHECK

For me, it's called accountability.  Unlike Mignon, if I had gotten on that scale on a regular basis, I would not be in the place I'm at today.  Yeah, the clothes got to tight, but not enough to make changes.  The numbers don't lie.  I faced the weekly scale today and lost 1.6 lbs this week for a total of 4.8 lbs.  How is that for precision?  I'm on target for my goal when I see you, however, I can tell it's going to be hard.  I've got to get more active.  Only way to do this is to find more capacity in my day. 

My successes for the past two weeks -- I haven't eaten one bite of junk food, eating "healthier", drinking water, AND one diet coke per day.  Today I switched up the diet coke habit to not drink as soon as I get up, but to have my milkshake first.  I didn't put my lips to the DC until 3 hours after I woke up.  This is huge for me!

So, I feel good.

Messages to Leslie & Camille -- I love the new WW as you are not dinged for fruit and the point system is so geared towards healtheir choices.  How are you liking the website?  Tomorrow, I begin to track my foods online and I will be asking Hayley to help me take my measurements.  Ugh.  Can you imagine?  I would have cringed if Mom had asked me.  Hopefully, she will be willing.

I'm relying on all of you to hold me accountable too.  Therefore, don't hold back.

Good night!

Kim

Just back from my beach walk. Saw three huge pelicans. Pretty far north although I have seen them before. Fighting winds on the way back. This should count for some calorie burn. The tomatoes don't have any effect on the skin thing. Had a small bowl of the cut up fruit for breakfast. Blueberries, strawberries and canaloupe - 1 cup-1 point thats not bad.  I think drinking water makes a BIG difference in the eating picture. Going to start my pedicure in a little bit.  Have a great day all.

Life is huge today. Don't get me wrong. Just voiceless. On tract. Let's hike and walk and stroll  or whatever we can do in August with a love for ourselves and each other.  Giving myself a pedicure tommorrow. $24. for all my supplies. Should last the summer.  Love yourself!

Mignon--Everything you said is so "right on".  An ounce is a win.  We all need to be mindful eaters.  I am not back to the gym yet but plan to be.  Can't fight what my leg keeps telling me--which is "be patient".  Have a good eating day/night, my dears.

COUNTDOWN DAY 65--IN CASE ANYONE'S LOST TRACK

I haven't weighed myself in 30 years. For me, the scale triggers a preoccupation with weight and both under- and over-eating -- thus, putting myself at risk for a relapse into bulimia, the horror of which I have made a deep commitment never to experience again. The self-created rule I live by:  if you eat it, it stays in.


So since getting back to Santa Monica a few weeks ago, maybe I've lost an ounce. For me, that's moving in the right direction. I can live with an ounce at a time. I can't "fight" with my weight. I'll always lose. So my focus is on eating foods dense with nutrients. No empty calories. And no carbohydrates, even whole wheat bread, that turn quickly to sugar. Only whole grains, fresh vegetables and fruit, nuts, quinoa, veggie burgers. When you're an emotional eater like me, overly dependent on comfort food, eating only "alive" foods is difficult over time. I have to keep it gentle. Letting go of sweets. Returning to aerobic exercise, which for me in past years has gone hand-in-glove with being lean. Can't push though. My whole being says it's had enough of me pushing it. This happened after my mastectomy. My body wants to move, but not if my intention is to "whip it into shape." Haven't walked, hiked, or gotten on my exercise bike yet, but want to. So these are my morning thoughts.

As of today, 10 days off sugar. (Of course I was off sugar for 7 years once -- but that was then, this is now.) No Diet Coke in quite a few months. Eating plant-based pretty much since last fall, with only two exceptions that I remember. Eating no dairy has been noticeably good for me, in terms of how I feel. All that said, thoughts of sweets are never far away.

Well, almost two weeks of mindful eating!  Actually joined the crowds at the grocery store late this afternoon.  Came away with fruits, vegs, oatmeals, ground turkey and chicken.  Just had a delicious dinner of flounder and mega salad.  YUM.  Good luck to my favorite people in the whole wide world this week.

MORE ON HEMP'S NUTRITION

HEMP PROTEIN POWDER NUTRITION

Hemp seed is a common ingredient in plant-based protein powders because of its high protein content. Hemp protein powder is an alternative protein source for people who are sensitive to soy and dairy. It is commonly used among people who follow vegetarian, vegan, macrobiotic and raw food diets. In addition to its high protein content, hemp protein powder provides minerals and vitamins.

CALORIES

Different manufacturers have different processing methods, so the calorie content of hemp protein powder will vary depending on the brand names. According to the Hemp Protein Guide, one serving of hemp protein powder is 30 g or 2 tbsp. This serving size has a typical calorie content between 120 and 134 calories. When more of the hemp's naturally occurring fats are removed from its seeds, the protein powder that is produced may contain fewer calories.

CARBOHYDRATES

According to the Hemp Protein Guide, the carbohydrate content of hemp protein powder may range from 5 to 7 g per serving. The carbohydrate content will vary according to the specific brand used and processing method of the company. Typically, 1 g or less of the carbohydrate content is from natural sugars. The rest of the carbohydrate content is comprised mainly of dietary fiber. Hemp protein powder's high dietary fiber content may be helpful in maintaining proper digestive health and a stable blood sugar level.

PROTEIN

According to the Hemp Protein Guide, one 30 g serving of hemp protein powder may offer between 13 and 15 g of quality protein. The protein content of hemp protein powder includes all nine of the essential amino acids. Thus, hemp is a "complete" protein. Furthermore, 65 percent of the protein in hemp protein powder is in the form of edestin. Edestin is an easily digested globulin that may offer immunity-promoting properties.

FAT

The fat content of hemp protein powder may range from 3.5 to 6 g per 30 g serving. This number will vary among different brands of the powder. This fat content offers minimal saturated fat and zero trans fat. One 30 g serving supplies a rich amount of essential fatty acids and supports a healthy balance of omega-6 and omega-3 fats. This balance of omega fats may protect against heart disease, certain types of cancer and also support brain health.

MINERAL AND VITAMIN CONTENT

Hemp protein powder is minimally processed, so it retains many of the minerals and vitamins found in the original hemp seed source. According to Ruth's Hemp Foods, one serving of hemp protein powder offers 24 percent of the recommended daily intake for vitamin A, 34 percent for iron, 75 percent for magnesium, 5 percent for calcium and 24 percent for manganese. This nutritional profile can make hemp protein powder a healthy nutritional choice for people who need to support their dietary needs with a plant-based protein.

TRADER JOE'S ORGANIC HEMP PROTEIN POWDER

Col, here is the macro-nutrition breakdown for TJ's hemp powder. Note that this breakdown is for 2 Tbsp.

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size: 2 Tbsp (30g)

Amount per Serving

Calories 130

Calories from Fat 22.5

% Daily Value *

Total Fat 2.5g

3%

Saturated Fat 0g

0%

Cholesterol 0mg

0%

Sodium 10mg

0%

Total Carbohydrate 17g

5%

Dietary Fiber 11g

44%

Sugars 5g

Protein 9g

18%

Est. Percent of Calories from:

Fat

17.8%

Carbs

53.8%

Protein

28.5%

* Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet. Your daily values may be higher or lower depending on your calories needs.

Read more: http://www.livestrong.com/thedailyplate/nutrition-calories/food/trader-joes/organic-hemp-protein-powder-vanilla/#ixzz1xPsUX8iJ

Trader Joe's lists all of its vegan products -- 4 screen-pages worth -- on its website:  www.traderjoes.com.

Day 66

Wow isn't it amazing how fast time goes.  Last night for employee meal they served pork roll and cheese sandwiches with french fries. Now that may sound disgusting but I used to love that! I didn't feel any urge to indulge. I knew I'd probably be hungry so around 9 I had probably 5 oz of prime NY sirloin. That probably isn't much better.  Going shopping and chopping today.  Walked on the beach and it is a beautiful day. Have a great day all. Water, Water is my goal day.

I am just learning to use my phone and all this app stuff or I would have made it closer. I must say I'm feeling a bit technologically challenged.

DINNER OUT

Imagine being on the water and eating outside on a patio SURROUNDED by hedges of hydrangeas.  OMG.  It was breathtaking!  Of course, I planned to duplicate at my home and move my hydrangeas from a spot and create this effect around my deck. In order to make it work, I will have to buy more.  I'm mulling it over.

Dinner was fantastic and I stuck to the plan I made it advance.  Broccoli rabe is OK and I don't think I'd rush to order it again.    Guess what ladies -- not a bite of bread.  I did, however, have 2 drinks and blew my points for the day and had to dig into the weekly reseve.

I'm going to have to buy Metamucil this weekend as I'm really struggling to go to the bathroom.  To the point, I'm bleeding.  I don't understand it as I'm doing mostly all the right things.

We are going to have beautiful weather today and I plan to work in the yard and walk for one hour before it gets dark.  Have a great day!

Kim

IS THE JUICE WORTH THE SQUEEZE

Definitely Yes.  I find a great thing in my bag of tricks is lemon for both the zest and the juice.  I use it on vegetables, homemade salad dressing, and in my water too.  Need 2 tools to make it easy.  Citrus Press and a scorer.  Give it a try

Today must be one of those blow-by-blow reporting days. Bought more fresh greens, including kale and arugula; orange, yellow and red peppers which I just cut up (A+ for me) and another pineapple which I also cut up (A++). Goodnight.

I shopped at Trader Joe's today. What's important to report is what I did not buy:
Cinnamon Coffee Cake, Peanut-Butter-filled pretzels, crackers, chocolate. I believe our team-blog enabled my resolve today. Thanks, team.

MISS KIM
I'm not certain I'm "teachable" yet when it comes to portions. (Can't bring myself to write portion "control," because that word makes me want to do the opposite.)


That said, I'm trying to envision what foods I'd put into the 1-cup containers you recommend. Examples, please? 

MISS LEL
Can't get the Blogger "Comment" thing to work, so for now I'll have to comment as a regular post. And I do have to comment to Miss Lel. Dear Miss Lel, no no no no no on the mush thing. Now now now now. You can't run and you can't hide from oatmeal. You & Kim can try, but oatmeal will get you in the end. I hope. Remember that I, who would rather starve -- to death -- than eat anything gooey that's not sweet or a pasta sauce, I eat oatmeal every other morning and LIKE it. Trust me. (The Quaker Oats kind comes in a modest-sized packet, so I don't even think it's an entire cup after microwaving. It's the berries etc that bring the volume up to maybe a cup.) I'm just saying...

a little at a time

Day 68. 147.7 on the digital scale. But, gratefully it has been pointed out to me I should do this naked in the am after I've gone to the bathroom. I started my own little chart today of 8 square boxes.  This is my 8 oz of water. I have never been a water drinker. Even with the kidney stones I have always found it so much of a challenge. I drink my 8 oz of  metamucil in the morning for about the past 2 months. I have to down these others too. I am just not much of a sipper. Maybe over time I will become one. And Mignon, I told Col I thank you for the additional years till I have to get over the mush factor. It won't be any time soon.
I have a picture of the restaurant for the party from the water. I am going now to try to figure how to get it on here it looks great.  As long as that scale is going in the right direction we're good.

PORTIONS
When they handed out the pamphlet on portions, I must have been laying on my down sofa eating a bag of cookies.  "Just take a few out of the bag," Colleen says. "The size of your fist," Camille says. "Portion control," say the weight-loss police. I think I need a private chef to prepare my bowls and plates for me. I can't stay in the lines.

Going out to Dinner Challenge

I'm going out to dinner tonight to celebrate a friend's 50th at a seafood restaurant on the water in Tiverton RI.  Leslie - it's a sister restaurant to Hemengway's.  I have actually looked at the menu in advance to plan my attack to be successful.  What is broccoli rabe and is it a good choice?  I really do not want a salad as I've been eating that all wee.  Want to shake it up.

Looking forward to grilled swordfish, glass of wine, hopefully good weather, and fun with friends

Salad Tips .....  White Balsamic Vinegar and if you need the crunch whole wheat melba rounds

THE EXTRAORDINARY ORDINARY SALAD


Thanks to my stay at Colleen's, I've rediscovered my taste for the everyday salad. Colleen actually takes the time to cut up a variety of fresh vegetables to add to the lettuce. Sounds like a no-brainer to anyone making a salad, but over time I've devolved to eating lettuce and spinach only. The thought of having to take the cucumber or carrots or peppers or other bits out of the refrigerator, to then set up the cutting board, to then wield the knife, to have to put the remaining vegetables back in the fridge, at some point it all became too much. I thought the leafy greens were good enough. Only trouble is, without realizing it, my super-simplified salads eventually ran their course. A bunny rabbit wouldn't have been tempted.


So this week, not only did I buy vegetables intended for salad, but I cut them up and put them into  separate containers and only then did they go into the refrigerator. And this tactic worked. Making a more interesting salad took no extra effort.


Knowing me, though, I'll soon be bored with the usual cuke, carrots, etc. I'll need to mix it up. Tonight I added fresh strawberries to my salad--a combination I tasted for the first time last week at 10 Village Drive.


How to mix it up? Toasted nuts? Walnuts? Pecans? Avocado? The full color spectrum of peppers? Grated parmesan? -- a dairy food I haven't given up yet and might never. Different flavored vinegars? -- for instance, someone gifted me a Fig Vinegar, a few drops of which are transformative. Arugula?-- which I love. Non-bitter varieties of kale? Kim--dried cranberries? But no croutons, however, which can crack teeth made fragile by huge 60-year old silver fillings.


Tentative new committment:  getting my fresh greens at our local farmer's markets. We have 3 every week in Santa Monica. All the Santa Monica chefs buy their produce there.